The needle dropped on track five on the album that is the first season of HBO’s “Vinyl” on Sunday night. Here are five of the best lines from the episode – and not all the best lines were made of cocaine.
“He’s got a flute!” – Clark
The episode opens with medieval prog-rockers Wizard Fist performing at a showcase for American Century. Despite the band’s arsenal of lutes, flutes, helmets, beards, fire and beards on fire, Richie remains unimpressed. Clark, the hapless A&R guy, fails to bring a new band to Richie to sign and this leads to a pathetic scene in Julie Silver’s office with Clark begging not to be fired. He’s not, but he is demoted to Jaime Vine’s position of “sandwich girl.”
“I’m Kip Stevens, fuck your mom.” – Kip
A meeting to polish up the Nasty Bits image takes place with Kip, Lester, Richie and Julie at American Century. Richie tells Kip he needs a bio for the band’s press kit, but that’s not all. He also wants Kip to fire Duck, the Nasty Bits’ lead guitarist (and Kip’s best friend). Richie gives him an ultimatum. Do it soon or he’ll take away an opening slot for the New York Dolls. Kip refuses and Richie threatens to slap Kip, then storms off to do some coke. We get it Richie – you’re intense. Tension mounts and comes to a head during a Nasty Bits recording session and Lester steps in to give the axe man the axe. Lester provides another great bit of dialog, when he asks Duck what he did before the band and Duck answers that he worked in a bowling alley. “Get your bowling alley job back,” Lester says. Later we see Kips’ fondness for Big Star and heroin.
“You up for some fondue? If not we can fondon’t” – Richie
Richie’s got jokes. Very bad jokes. Richie sets up a business dinner to retain Hannibal on American Century’s label. As an afterthought, Richie calls Devon and tries to make it into a double date. Devon catches on, but, desperate for a night away from kids and dirty dishes, agrees anyway.
“I got a bump” – Hannibal
The night, as ’70s nights often do , devolves into cocaine and disco in a downtown apartment. Devon and Hannibal are grinding (more like dry humping to music) and Richie watches until he can’t take it anymore. He tries to interrupt by offering Hannibal a bump, but Hannibal replies he’s already got one (and that’s not an ounce of cocaine in his pants). Devon confirms that Hannibal is packing some heat in his pants and this sends Richie into hysterics. The night doesn’t end well.
“Goodnight you fucking putz” – Jackie Jarvis
The night ends so badly, that after Richie and Devon leave, Jackie Jarvis, the head of a rival record company, parties with Hannibal and steals him away from the American Century label. Jarvis gives Richie a call to rub a little salt in the wound.
Other stuff from episode 5
- Hannibal is good at anagrams. He flexes his word muscle at the dinner table with anagrams for Devon Finestra (Finest Dove Ran) and Richie Finestra (He in Racist Fire – also the name of episode 5).
- Richie’s office is tapped.
- Lou Reed was the first goth kid. Julian Casablancas’ version of “White Light/White Heat” was a highlight of episode 5.
- Richie’s got a new partner to help with the rebrand of American Century and the new label. And his new partner is also his ex-girlfriend. So, what could go wrong?
- Devon is headed to the Hotel Chelsea. So episode 6 should feature lots of close up of a pale Andy Warhol.
What are some of your favorite lines from “Vinyl”?